Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart (27 January 1756 – 5 December 1791) is probably the best-known classical composer and musician in the history of man.  Why?  Well put most simply: he was a musical prodigy.  Mozart composed over 600 works - many of which are considered the pinnacle of their genre... hell, the man was writing symphonies by the age of five while the rest of us were busily shitting in our pants without even knowing we had done so... add his frequent performances for royalty throughout his childhood and adolescent years to the equation and you begin to realise, if you hadn't already, that when it comes to music: Mozart was a God amongst mere mortals.

Mozart, while rejoiced for his musical wizardry, is not remembered for being an absolute dirt bag - but he damn well should be.  It makes sense when you think about it... nowadays we are far more likely to imagine a classical musician enjoying a nice pair of slacks, rather than what is in them.  Maybe it's the gray hair, but it seems more believable for us to picture a rock star like Steven Tyler as a drug-&-alcohol-fueled infidelity machine than it is for us to picture a wig-wearer, who is deftly fingering a piano, in the same light.

What we need to remember is that back in the 16th and 17th centuries, classical musicians WERE the rock stars... and Mozart was king.

Let us pay homage to one of my personal favourites of Mozart's work: a little canon composed in B-flat major entitled: "Leck mich im Arsch" - which in English quite literally translates to "lick me in the arse".